It's official, White Moms are soooo lame.

In case you hadn't heard the big news Obama is now officially black (at least on paper anyway.)

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/36157764/ns/politics-white_house/

It's been on my mind for a few weeks now and honestly his decision bothers me a little bit.  Apparently he has decided that his mother, all of her relatives, and all of the ancestors that came before her don't officially exist (at least on paper anyway.)  I'm sure it's for purely political reasons why he decided to disregard half of his racial heritage on the census form.  Honestly you could skew the political implications many ways and that's not really why I'm writing about this.  I suppose I am writing about this because it strikes a chord with me.  My husband is black, and I am a white mother with three bi-racial children.  And it makes me wonder....will I too be written out of my family's racial existence some day?

In our house we are just "us".  Color is never an issue and so far it hasn't been one at school either.  However, that doesn't mean the kids are unaware of the difference between all of us.  I like to think that we are raising them to know that it's what on the inside that counts not the outside.  As far as heritage, we want them to understand where they come from on both sides of the family because they have some pretty cool stuff on both sides.  But! suppose they marry someone who is black?  Apparently that means they are now completely black. Well that's fine for David but where does that leave me?  Will I become a ancestral blip that everyone will conveniently forget about?  What is the precedent that Obama is setting as the first bi-racial President (not the first Black President as everyone likes to say)? What is he saying to all the children out there of bi-racial relationships.....that you must choose one heritage over the other?  That you must become one over the other?  Why can't a person just be themselves, a person who celebrates the best of where they came from and where they are going in life?

I found this article today that goes over both arguments about racial identity.  The first being that if you are part black, you are always going to be viewed as black.  The second being that race is basically a state of mind, a choice, a wholeness of yourself...therefore you recognize all aspects of your racial identity..or you can chose to only recognize the racial identity to which you believe best identifies yourself even if you aren't even that race .   Obviously,  I agree with the second view (except for the last statement, I think you need to see all of yourself with a clear view not a cloudy one).

http://www.ajc.com/news/nation-world/black-or-biracial-census-473104.html

As always, race is a sensitive issue.  But is our household we try to tackle it a little more head on as I am trying very hard to give my children a healthy respect for both sides of their racial heritage.  I want them to be proud to say "I am black and white.".......welllllll with some South American Indian and the other side of the family tree from India......but we'll get to that later! 

Dinner with The Fam

I never really put up pictures of David and I so, viola!  Anywho..we took the kids out to dinner last night and had a great time.  It's kind of our version of sitting down for family dinner.  You know, since I don't really cook.  That and we are never home all that much in the evenings because if all the activities that we are involved in.  It seems like we are always eating on the road.  Whenever we get the chance we like to sit down and have a nice family meal.....ahem....at one of our many favorite restaurants.   The kids were hilarious last night.  I suppose I should have been all, like, "That is not appropriate dinner behavior" but I found last night's situation hilarious.  So Isabelle says to Lilly, "Hey Lilly, spell 'I cup' ".  Frankly I was curious how this was all going to go down so I sat back to watch and enjoy the show.  Lilly looks back at her really confused and says " I cut? hmmmm I. K.U.T?....no no no I.C.U.T!"  Isabelle is all like, "no no spell I cup, I CUP!"  "OH, ok....I.C.U.P......I...C...UUU..PPPP....? I don't get it what's the point?"  Meanwhile Chase and Isabelle are cracking up.  Ok, I admit it..so am I at this point. And then Lilly starts giggling "OOOHHH I GET IT!!  I see you PEE!!! Ahahahahaha.  Hey!   Isabelle, I see you pee!  Hey!  Chase, I see you pee!  Hey!  Daddy, I see you pee!  Hey! Mommy, I see you pee!"  Ok, I admit it, definitely not dinner talk! But, how could I take away Lilly's opportunity to figure out for herself the classic I.C.U.P.   And I wanted to be able to see for myself the moment when she figured it out.  The look on her face was classic when she figured it out all by herself what the big joke was.  She was so proud of herself and she thought it was hilarious!!  It's a moment that I did not want to miss.  It kept us all rolling all the way out the door.  I love family dinner!  One of these days we are going to actually have to have one at home! HA! 

Motivation Smotivation - Who needs it anyways

  Do you ever find yourself shooting rubber-bands across the floor because the cats love to chase them? And what you're really supposed to be doing is getting dressed for the day?.....also it just terrible for loosing all the rubber-bands for your hair.  Do you ever find yourself surfing the internet when you should be cleaning your kitchen? Or posting on your blog when you should be starting the laundry. Obviously these are issues that I do not have!!  I am the master of productive output.  I can name numerous things that I have accomplished today.  Please see me tomorrow and I will inform you as to what....exactly..those..things.....are. Oooo Look, my Cat!  I think it has one of my rubber-bands in it's mouth....I should probably go get that back...eh, I can do it later.  Anywayssss! (David hates it when I say anyways. "It's not anyways, it's anyway!!  Total pet peeve of his.  That's a shout out to you Uncle Larry!)  What was I saying?  Oh, right!  MOTIVATION!  I am a highly motivated individual (especially today!)  I think I'm going to go stare at my kitchen.  Sometimes I just stare at it and think nice clean thoughts.  Funny how that never works.  Maybe I should glare at it instead? Shame it into being clean.  Somehow I don't think that will work either. Because really it all comes down to one thing.  What was that word again?  Oh yeah, Motivation.

Easter Decorating Fun

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So I decided to take a leaf out of my sister’s book and decorate for Easter.  Normally Christmas is the only holiday I decorate for.  But, I liked the idea of trying to be a little more “domestic” around the house.   *hee*  The idea of me being “domestic” around the house made me giggle.   There, it made me do it again.  Isabelle has started going to Popi’s house on Tuesday’s to learn how to cook (cause she sure ain’t learn’n it from me).  This week was her first week there and when I asked her how it went she stated: “Wow,  I had no idea it took so long to cook real food.”  My mother looked at me and asked, what did you feed them for dinner yesterday?  “Pot roast, apple sauce, and fresh vegetables,” I said.   “Well, that must have taken awhile to cook…..?”  “Erm……No,no,not really only about 5 minutes like the package said it would.” Sometimes I don’t think my mother knows what to do with me.
 
When the kids and I were at Rebecca’s house a few weeks ago their family had to step out of the house one of the nights and she wasn’t able to fix dinner.  My kids where so crushed when they came downstairs and I was the only one there.  “Mom, where’s Aunt Rebecca?,” they asked with obvious panic.   “She’s not here,” I stated with irritation, “ They all had to be somewhere.”   “Whaaaaaat?!?  But, who’s going to fix dinner?!?!,” they all screamed with apparent terror in their voices as if they already knew what the answer would be.  “I AM………I’m ordering pizza.”    “No, NOT PIZZA!!! Please MOM, anything but that.  Do we have to have pizza….AGAIN!!!”   They begged, they pleaded but they couldn’t persuaded me to change my mind (what? they didn’t expect me to actually cook did they?)  Meanwhile, in Cousinville Rebecca was telling her kids “You had better behave because Aunt Sylvia *duDA* ordered pizza and you won’t get any if you don’t.”
So, anyways…the kids love the decorations. Chase says the decorations are better than last year’s.  I pointed out that I didn’t decorate last year to which he replied “Yeah, that’s why they’re better than last year’s.”  Isabelle feels like we should have bought more! We need more decorations!  And Lilly was a little disappointed we didn’t get the Hello Kitty basket for the kitchen table.  But the fact that the cats use the basket we did get as their new bed more than makes up for it because it’s so super cute!

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To die! Or not to die! That is the question...or in other words: Isabelle was home sick today.

 

So Isabelle was home sick today.  Like, actually sick, not kinda sick, or sorta sick, or "but MoMmmmmmm  I really need to stay home today," sick (What do you mean you really need to stay home today?!?).  When Lilly or Chase stay home actually sick they lay on the sofa like a limp noodle all day.  It's awesome.  Their little mouths never open (well....except to throw up).  No complaining, no talking, no back talk, no arguing, they just lay there like little rag dolls.  Awesome.  All I have to do is lovingly administer liquids and crackers every once in a while, take their temperature as they spend their day watching TV in a fog of  virusy stupor. It's like playing house with live dolls!!  Seriously, it brings back all those little girl mother hen feelings.  Or maybe it's just my dormant "maternal instinct" waking up.  Ahhhh, but Isabelle, yes Isabelle....if you have been reading this blog you might have gathered that she is a little different...a little more "vocal" shall we say.

Today has been like a day at the car races.  I've never actually been to a car race, but it is much how I imagine it.  ISABELLE, you may now start your engines!!! *whimper*  *groan* "Mommy? Mommy? Are you there?"  "Um, yes Big Girl.  I'm sitting right here.  On the sofa across from you.  Much like I was five minutes ago.....the last time you asked."  "Ok, I feel like I'm going to throw up!"  "Then go the the bathroom, or use the throw-up bucket that I put next to you."  Rinse and repeat for the next 20 laps around the race track.

IT'S an exciting moment here during the race! Things are really starting to heat up and the pressure is on! *MOAN* *WHINE* "MOMMY, my stomach!!  It hurts!!  It hurts SO BAD."  "ARGHHHHHH"  "ARGHHHHHH" "ARGHHHHHHH"  "MOMMY, I'm DYING.  I'M DYING I TELL YOU!!!"  "Oooooook Isabelle, how about another sip of Ginger Ale? And then why don't you try to watch some more TV"  Now, don't think that I'm completely unsympathetic.  It did cross my mind at one point, gee?  What if she has appendicitis or something?  But with Isabelle you have to take into account the drama factor.  And considering that she is now peacefully asleep, as show in the picture above, I would say appendicitis is unlikely.  What is more likely is that she has that magical “stomach bug” that is perpetually going around school in it’s ever changing form.  I have to say as she is quietly, peacefully sleeping snuggled up against me on the sofa while I write this that it’s nice to softly stroke her forehead, adjust her blanket, and caress her hair.  You know, get all maternal and stuff.      So, for now, the race has come to an end.  We will see if it picks up again when she wakes up!

Hey? What ever happened to Grandpa?

 

So a few weeks ago The Day finally arrived.  I’ve been waiting for this particular day for a long time…never quite sure how well it was going to go, or how my kids were going to react.   We were in the car (of course…weird, now that I think about it, we are always in the car when they ask their deep questions), anyway…We were in the car and Isabelle gives this very penetrating, thoughtful, “Mom?”  I was like, whoa wonder what this one is about, “Yeah, big girl?”  “So I was thinking and I have a question.  So we have a Noni and a Popi, right? (that’s what they call my mom and dad)”  “That’s right,” I answered, getting a little panicky in my stomach because I had a pretty good idea where her logic was headed.  This was territory we had never covered because I had decided to wait until they asked about it.  “And we had a Grandma, but she died,” Isabelle continued, “So what happened to Grandpa?”  The car got deathly silent, I was driving, but I could tell that Lilly and Chase had all of a sudden become ALL ears.  “OH Man,” I was saying to myself, “What do I say?  Do I tell them the truth?  If I do are they going to freak out and think that Daddy is going to leave us? OK, calm down.” At that point I decided to do what I always do, just tell it like it is.  “Grandma raised Daddy by herself.  I don’t know why, but Grandpa decided he didn’t want to be a dad and he left when Daddy was a baby.”  Boy was I sweating at this point.  The car was still silent.  “OH NO,” I thought, “I shouldn’t have just told them like that, they don’t even know what to say, they probably are about to cry or something.”  And then Isabelle says, “Wow, that is the COOLEST thing I have EVER HEARD!!!!!  Grandma was a STRONG single black mom!!!  She raised Daddy ALL by herself!!  She was a strong black WOMAN!! (seriously, it’s like I'm raising a mini feminist here…not really sure how that’s happening…….)”  And then Chase breaks in with his analytical little self (so cute), “And don’t forget she was a college professor AND a single mom! She was smart! That is really cool!  I think that was really awesome that she was able to do all that.”  To which Isabelle replies, “That’s right, she was a college professor AND a single mom.  I’m going to be just like Grandma when I grow up!!”   After Chase and Isabelle had calmed down after realizing that they had had a single black mother for a Grandmother this WHOLE time and had never EVEN known.  The tragedy, the questions they could have asked.  Lilly did have a few question about Grandpa leaving, mostly about “why would he do that?”  I just told her that I didn’t know why he did it, but our Daddy wasn’t ever going to leave because he loved us and we were sealed together in the temple and we were going to be a family forever no matter what.  All in all, The Day was a heck of alot more amusing than I ever imagined it would ever be. 

The Greatest Find Ever!

Why Yes!!  That is a Gigantic Bottle of hand soap shaped like a women’s shoe, complete with green beads and a rose stuck inside!!!!   I couldn’t pass an opportunity like this up.  A picture had to be taken.

While at first glance what seems incredibly tacky, these are the things (in my limited opinion) that when added correctly to a room can add interest and fun ( and perhaps some humor) into a room. A little bit of kitsch can sometimes be just the added touch of quirk a room needs.  I have to say that this one inspires me.  I’m imaging a master bath done with white wood cabinets, cream marble countertops and a light sea green wall.  Glass tile in pale creams and various shades of pale sea green  on the shower wall and around the bath.   The floor of the shower is made of  stones instead of tile for a soothing feel on your feet.  On the cream counter top will be a display of Apothecary jars in varying heights.  In one will be cotton balls, the other green bath salt.  Now picture our little shoe sans plastic wrap and the other accoutrements that it currently has and place a nice big silky cream bow on it.  The shoe will now be placed in front of the two apothecary jars.  Fill the bathroom with all the other necessary design elements and you have a beautiful tranquil bath while still staying just a little off beat.  Now that’s my kind of style!