Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Not so Happy Valentines Day....
Chase and Isabelle came home from school today very upset (Isabelle more than Chase.....it take a whole lot to make Chase upset). There will not be any Valentines Day party in their classes this year. Only Lilly's class will be having a party. Isabelle's teacher told them they were only having a Halloween, Christmas, and End of Year party. Isabelle complained loudly and passionately the whole way home how horrible her teacher was treating her and how awful her situation was. Meanwhile, Lilly is next to her sobbing about how her whole class has "silent lunch" for the whole week!! even though she didn't do anything (which she probably didn't). The car started to sound like gigantic dissonant song sung in a horrible round until finally as we pulled into the driveway I said (erm.....loudly said....well...I might have yelled ever so gently...)"THAT'S ENOUGH"!! I turned around and said to the kids "We have three things to discuss". "First, all of the teachers have had their pay decreased this year. That means they don't make as much money and perhaps they have decided they don't want the expense a party will bring. Second, many people besides teachers are not making as much money and they might not be able to afford to buy valentines day cards". I could see the fire go out of Isabelle's eyes and she and Chase both kinda said "Oh". "Third, Lilly when you get home you can sit at the table and talk as much as you want to make up for not talking at the lunch table. Will that make it better"? Lilly thought about it for a minute and decided that this was an acceptable solution and dried her tears. We discussed some of these issues for a little bit and what they meant and I answered any questions the kids had. I don't think my kids are ungrateful for the life their father provides. Nor or they in anyway spoiled. Trust me, they get told "No" allllllllll the time. I think it is more that sometimes I have to remind them that what they consider the baseline for normalcy is not always accurate.
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Kudos to taking the time to talk with your children and actually explaining things to them. I have often wished I had done more of that as my 5 were growing up.
ReplyDeleteSylvia, you handled that so-o-o well! All's well that end's well...
ReplyDeleteI love when parents back the teachers up- even when you don't know the whole story. i think it's a win/win situation when parents support teachers. good for you for not criticizing your child's teacher- even though your daughter had a right to be upset.
ReplyDeleteamy
(btw, I'm your cousin damon's wife) this is a touchy subject for me. :) can you tell?
Hahaha! You are so funny! I died laughing when I was reading that post. Everyone at work thinks I'm crazy. I could just imagine all of this happening in your car. You did such a good job handling that - it's amazing what kids will understand if we just take the time to explain it to them.
ReplyDeleteI like the way you handled that :) Poor Isabelle. The world is often against her. Well, when she gets here this weekend I'll let her help me in the kitchen- I'll even let her wear my favorite apron :)That should cheer her up!
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